I Am Mine

A little fanmail I found on the beach

Oh PJ. I love you so. And so do thousands of other people, most of them here in Seattle for a different reason than I am this week - to see this beloved band live.

I have a different mission: accompanying my eldest for registration and orientation for college. What a weird feeling it is to be here, at this point, and yet what a pleasure it is to accompany him to this incredible city to prepare for the next chapter of his life.

Each time we come to the Pacific Northwest, we discover a little bit more of it, and this time we got to visit a beautiful beach called Golden Gardens, within the city limits.

My son has loved the ocean his whole life, and now he gets to live in a place where it's just a few miles away, rather than halfway across the country. And I'm happy for him.

With friends at Golden Gardens

It was all Pearl Jam, all the time on the radio stations out here this week.

Here's one I heard that I'm less familiar with than the anthems from my college days:

The selfish, they're all standing in line
Faithing and hoping to buy themselves time
Me, I figure as each breath goes by
I only own my mind
North is to south what the clock is to time
There's east and there's west and there's everywhere life
I know I was born and I know that I'll die
The in between is mine
I am mine
And the feeling it gets left behind
All the innocence lost at one time
Significant behind the eyes
There's no need to hide
We're safe tonight
The ocean is full 'cause everyone's crying
The full moon is looking for friends at high tide
The sorrow grows bigger when the sorrow's denied
I only know my mind
I am mine
And the meaning it gets left behind
All the innocence lost at one time
Significance between the eyes
There's no need to hide
We're safe tonight
What
And the feelings that gets left behind
All the innocent broken with lies
Significance, between the lines
(We may need to hide)
And the meanings that get left behind
All the innocents lost at one time
We're all different behind the eyes
There's no need to hide

Yes, I am mine, and it's a good thing too -- because I'm losing one of the most grounding influences in my life: nearly daily physical contact with my firstborn. Because he's not mine, he's just mine to guide, and I'll have to do so from further away than I'd like, at least for a few years...

Take On Me

Zoomed in to see the second percussionist from the right

What? Last concert of my son's high school career? How did this get here so fast?! I can't quite believe it. Band was his favorite part of high school, and watching him shine there has been a magical part of motherhood.

What an emotional night! Thank goodness one of the songs they played was an old fave:

We're talking away
I don't know what I'm to say
I'll say it anyway
Today's another day to find you
Shying away
I'll be coming for your love, OK?

Take on me (take on me)
Take me on (take on me)
I'll be gone
In a day or two

So needless to say
Of odds and ends
But that's me stumbling away
Slowly learning that life is ok
Say after me
It's no better to be safe than sorry

Take on me (take on me)
Take me on (take on me)
I'll be gone
In a day or two

Oh, things that you say
Is it a life or just to play my worries away
You're all the things I've got to remember
You're shying away
I'll be coming for you anyway

Take on me (take on me)
Take me on (take on me)
I'll be gone
In a day or two
Take on me (take on me)
Take me on (take on me)
I'll be gone
In a day

Nope, I'll still be here. He'll be gone soon, though, moving out to Seattle and I will miss him like crazy. Good thing his little sister is still here, and still in band, so I don't have to say goodbye to all of this for a few more years...

Cry Me a River

So many gorgeous sunsets lately! #nofilter

My boyfriend and I had a date tonight at the movies.

We saw Lady Bird, which was such a good film.

I didn't know what it was about when we walked in, so I couldn't have known it would contain a scene where a child leaves for college.

As the scene unfolded, I let the tears fall, as this beauty from the soundtrack played:

You were my sun
You were my earth
But you didn't know
All the ways I loved you, no
So you took a chance
Made other plans
But I bet you didn't think
That they would come crashing down, no

You don't have to say what you did
I already know, I found out from him
Now there's just no chance
With you and me
There'll never be
Don't it make you sad about it?

You told me you love me
Why did you leave me all alone?
Now you tell me you need me
When you call me on the phone
Girl, I refuse
You must have me confused
With some other guy
The bridges were burned
Now it's your turn, to cry
Cry me a river
Cry me a river
Cry me a river
Cry me a river

You know that they say
Some things are better left unsaid
It wasn't like you only talked to him
And you know it
(Don't act like you don't know it)
All of these things people told me
Keep messing with my head
Should've picked honesty
Then you may not have blown it

You don't have to say what you did
I already know, I found out from him
Now there's just no chance
With you and me
There'll never be
Don't it make you sad about it?

You told me you love me
Why did you leave me all alone?
Now you tell me you need me
When you call me on the phone
Girl, I refuse
You must have me confused
With some other guy
The bridges were burned
Now it's your turn, to cry
Cry me a river
Cry me a river
Cry me a river
Cry me a river

Oh! The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving
Oh! The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving
Oh! The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving
Oh! The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving

You don't have to say what you did
I already know, I found out from him
Now there's just no chance
With you and me
There'll never be
Don't it make you sad about it?