Carry On

Heard this song on my way home from day number two of great Ashtanga practices with a gifted teacher and awesome Autumnal mountain bike rides at CamRock:

And after all's been said and done
Who said it best, were you the one?
Let's just forget, leave it behind
And carry on

If you should find the time to speak
Then speak to me, I'd never keep
You from your final destiny
So carry on

Into the quiet I am bound
What you have lost, I've never found
I lost my nerve, yet peace surrounds
So carry on

It's a beautiful song, in that distinctly Norah Jones way that her songs are beautiful, and it feels apropos of what the New Englander and I have decided to do:

And now that all's been said and done
Who said it best, were you the one?
Let's just forget, leave it behind
And carry on
Let's just forget, leave it behind
And carry on

We've decided to carry on with our love, and leave behind the years where things for the two of us didn't quite line up based on what we both brought to the relationship when we met.

It's a complicated history, to be sure, but it feels anything but complicated to me right now. It feels like everything's lining up the way my heart, mind, body and soul has been hoping it would!

Be Here To Love Me

Tonight's chefs: Reunited, and for today at least, it feels so good

Today was a pretty great day. We hung out at home more, grocery shopped so we had food to prepare at dinner, rode our bikes to a super cool park and played baseball and walked in a fountain...

The kids at Portland's awesome Deer Oaks Park

For some reason today I was able to spend more time enjoying the things we did together and less time in tears about the fact that our time together is coming to an abrupt end in just a couple of days.

Cooking dinner with the man who was my man was no exception. As we cooked, we listened to music, and though I wasn't previously familiar with this song, I wound up singing part of it to him as we held each other in the kitchen:

I want you to stay
and hold me and tell me you'll be here to love me today

And that's what I did. I held him and told him I'd be here to love him today. And I was. Fully present in the present, even with the goodbye looming in the near future. And it felt good to be there:

The moon's come and gone but a few stars hang on on to the sky
The wind's runnin' free but it ain't up to me ask why
The poets are demanding their pay
They've left me with nothin' to say
'cept hold me and tell me you'll be here to love me today
Just hold me and tell me that you'll be here to love me today

And the moon has come and gone. It is a new moon tomorrow, which I'm sure is somehow fitting and symbolic, but for right now, I don't want to think about tomorrow...