Kind and Generous

Going to work this morning felt hard, as did getting up for practice. I don't seem to have as much energy as I would like, or as I need.

I've been using one of my decks a couple of times a day to guide me extra during this period of transition, and this morning's card was kindness.

This made me more awake to kindness when I encountered it, which I did in at least two forms:

1) Nature's gifts - the beautiful sunny day, squirrels chasing each other up and down a huge tree, owls (my favorite) hooting on my walk, a bat in the park as I did my pre-pullup exercises (#goals); and

2) Spotify dialed up this kind and generous number:

You've been so kind and generous
I don't know how you keep on giving
For your kindness I'm in debt to you
For your selflessness, my admiration
And for everything you've done
You know I'm bound
I'm bound to thank you for it

You've been so kind and generous
I don't know how you keep on giving
For your kindness i'm in debt to you
And i never could have come this far without you
So for everything you've done
You know I'm bound
I'm bound to thank you for it

I want to thank you
For so many gifts
You gave with love and tenderness
I want to thank you
I want to thank you
For your generosity
The love and the honesty
That you gave me
I want to thank you
Show my gratitude
My love and my respect for you
I want to thank you
I want to

Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
I want to
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you

Thanks, Universe!

For You

Mirror Lake: It is indeed a mirror, and a beautiful one at that!

I needed a weekend so bad by Friday afternoon this week!

After a week of being up in the middle of the night working, I decided to officially unplug this weekend and spend time with my man.

We started, last night, with what we thought was going to be a hike at Devil's Lake. It seems I was so caught up in the conversation, however, that I missed the turn for the state park and Baraboo altogether.

We ended up at Mirror Lake - and it did not disappoint. What a mirror it was!

After our hike, we had a delicious dinner at Little Village Cafe, and heard this beauty on the way home:

Princess cards she sends me with her regards
Barroom eyes shine vacancy, to see her you gotta look hard
Wounded deep in battle, I stand stuffed like some soldier undaunted
To her Cheshire smile, I'll stand on file, she's all I ever wanted
But you let your blue walls get in the way of these facts
Honey, get your carpetbaggers off my back
You wouldn't even give me time to cover my tracks
You said, "Here's your mirror and your ball and jacks"
But they're not what I came for, and I'm sure you see that too

I came for you, for you, I came for you
But you did not need my urgency
I came for you, for you, I came for you
But your life was one long emergency
And your cloud line urges me
And my electric surges free

Crawl into my ambulance, your pulse is getting weak
Reveal yourself all now to me, girl, while you've got the strength to speak
'Cause they're waiting for you at Bellevue with their oxygen masks
But I could give it all to you now, if only you could ask
And don't call for your surgeon, even he says it's too late
It's not your lungs this time, it's your heart that holds your fate
Don't give me my money, honey, I don't want it back
You and your pony face and your Union Jack
Well, take your local joker and teach him how to act
I swear I was never that way, even when I really cracked
Didn't you think I knew that you were born with the power of a locomotive
Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound?
And your Chelsea suicide with no apparent motive
You could laugh and cry in a single sound

And your strength is devastating in the face of all these odds
Remember how I kept you waiting when it was my turn to be the god?

You were not quite half so proud when I found you broken on the beach
Remember how I poured salt on your tongue and hung just out of reach
And the band, they played the homecoming theme as I caressed your cheek
That ragged, jagged melody, she still clings to me like a leech
But that medal you wore on your chest always got in the way
Like a little girl with a trophy so soft to buy her way
We were both hitchhikers but you had your ear tuned to the roar
Of some metal-tempered engine on an alien, distant shore
So you left to find a better reason than the one we were living for
And it's not that nursery mouth that I came back for
It's not the way you're stretched out on the floor
'Cause I've broken all your windows and I've rammed through all your doors
And who am I to ask you to lick my sores?
And you should know that's true

The lyrics don't super fit, but it's the Boss, y'all. And you know what else?

He came for me.

And I was right here waiting...

Jump

The kids and I got motivated today and drove to one of our favorite Wisco spots this afternoon: Pewit's Nest. It's super picturesque but I don't have any photos because I didn't want to get my camera wet on the wade through the small, lovely, moss-covered canyon.

There's a spot on the wade from one end of the gorge to the other where people climb the side of the cliff and jump, as I did on one occasion when the kids and I were there with the New Englander.

Not today. The water level was lower than last time, and I didn't fancy hitting my feet on the rock again (and possibly harder), as I did the last time.

Instead, we watched others, and enjoyed the beautiful scenery while a little VH played on my very own internal soundtrack:

I get up, and nothin' gets me down
You got it tough, I've seen the toughest around
And I know, baby, just how you feel
You got to roll with the punches and get to what's real

Ah, can't you see me standin' here
I got my back against the record machine
I ain't the worst that you've seen
Ah, can't you see what I mean?

Ah
Might as well jump
(Jump)
Might as well jump
Go ahead an' jump
(Jump)
Go ahead and jump

Ow oh
Hey you
Who said that?
Baby, how you been?
You say you don't know
You won't know until you begin

So can't ya see me standing here
I got my back against the record machine
I ain't the worst that you've seen
Ah, can't you see what I mean?

Ah
Might as well jump
(Jump)
Go ahead and jump
Might as well jump
(Jump)
Go ahead and jump
Jump

Maybe next time!

In God's Country

I had a great week of practice this week, but because I was also responsible for getting my kids to camp four of the five days, it was a week of very early mornings. I kept finding that I would get really tired at 7pm, but by the time 10pm rolled around and my kids were finally in bed, I'd get a second wind and would be unable to fall asleep quickly. By Thursday night, when my kids were at their Dad's, I told myself I'd just go to sleep whenever I got tired, which happened to be 6:30pm. I was awake for an hour in the middle of the night, but all told by the time my alarm went off I'd gotten 11 hours of sleep!

As a result, I felt like a million bucks today. My practice felt easy and my Arboretum loop was the second fastest I've done -- not because I needed to be somewhere like the fasted one -- but because I felt like running fast.

When I heard this song on my run, a number of parts spoke to me, starting with the first line of this verse:

Sleep comes like a drug
In God's Country
Sad eyes, crooked crosses
In God's Country, yeah, yeah

Set me alight
We'll punch a hole right through the night
Everyday the dreamers die
See what's on the other side

And then there's the first two lines of this verse, which have always been my favorite:

She is liberty
And she comes to rescue me
Hope, faith, her vanity
The greatest gift is gold

This has been such a gorgeous summer in Madison -- the most beautiful I can remember. And running through the Arb -- well, it does feel like God's country:

Sleep comes like a drug
In God's Country
Sad eyes, crooked crosses
In God's Country, yeah

But I'm gonna have to part ways with Bono on the last verse, because I don't feel burned by the fire of love -- I just feel warmed by it:

Naked flame
She stands with a naked flame
I stand with the sons of Cain
Burned by the fire of love
Burned by the fire of love