Irreplaceable

Yesterday was a particularly rough day in the files of healing from trauma. Flashbacks during practice, tears, inability to focus, etc. At the end of the day, when I was wondering how I was going to attend to my responsibilities, I texted my childhood friend.

"I have no idea how to deal with the pain that you have," she said. "Your strength is you. You are worthy of love and wholeness."

More tears, but this time, tears of relief at being seen, supported and loved.

And then I had a good sleep, got up, showered, and got in the car to drive to practice this morning.

On the way, I had Bey to reinforce that feeling of strength within:

You must not know about me, you must not know about me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter of fact, he'll be here in a minute, baby
You must not know about me, you must not know about me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinking
You're irreplaceable

So go ahead and get gone
Call up that chick and see if she's home
Oops, I bet you thought, that I didn't know
What did you think I was putting you out for
Because you was untrue
Rollin' her around in the car that I bought you
Baby drop them keys
Hurry up before your taxi leaves

Standing in the front yard
Tellin' me, how I'm such a fool
Talkin' bout, I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted

What caused her pain may be different, but her power comes from knowing she made it through hell before, and she'll make it through again.

Same as mine, and for whatever reason, for me this lyric is like a powerful version of the saying God doesn't give anyone anything they can't handle:

You must not know about me, you must not know about me