Give Me Love

Such a gorgeous boy -- love this kid!

No one gives me love quite like the babies, and that was particularly true today. I got to hold the little guy pictured here at Colectivo today, and eventually, he fell asleep in my arms.

Later in the day, I went to a guided meditation class called the inward journey. I was hoping to release some of the anger that I have been feeling (and spewing) for the last couple of weeks.

What came to me instead was an insight into where the anger was coming from -- even better! -- because that means I can address the source.

The first image that came to me was the little guy pictured here. And then in my mind's eye I saw my daughter at his age, and I felt this overwhelming helplessness about my inability to keep her safe.

I suffered from postpartum depression with baby #2, and I knew that I had a lot of regret about what I missed. I've already done a bunch of healing around that.

But this new insight helped me see why I was flying into a rage when her brother hurt her or I thought what he was doing might hurt her -- and it was this powerlessness I felt when she was so small and I was so tapped out.

On the way home, I heard this song by George Harrison. It's a beauty, and it totally works to mark this day:

Give me love
Give me love
Give me peace on earth
Give me light
Give me life
Keep me free from birth
Give me hope
Help me cope, with this heavy load
Trying to, touch and reach you with,
Heart and soul

Om m m m m m m m m m m m m m
M m m my lord. ..

Please take hold of my hand, that
I might understand you

Won't you please
Oh won't you

Give me love
Give me love
Give me peace on earth
Give me light
Give me life
Keep me free from birth
Give me hope
Help me cope, with this heavy load
Trying to, touch and reach you with,
Heart and soul

Om m m m m m m m m m m m m m
M m m my lord. ..

Please take hold of my hand, that
I might understand you

Yes, please do!