Head over Heels

This song popped into my head today for no apparent reason:

Been running so long
I've nearly lost all track of time
In every direction
I couldn't see the warning signs
I must be losin' it
'Cause my mind plays tricks on me
It looked so easy
But you know looks sometimes deceive

Been running so fast
Right from the starting line
No more connections
I don't need any more advice
One hand's just reaching out
And one's just hangin' on
It seems my weaknesses
Just keep going strong

Head over heels
Where should I go
Can't stop myself
Outta control
Head over heels
No time to think
Looks like
The whole world's out of sync

And hearing it made me reflect on the last time I fell in love, and how early and how often grief was mixed in with the head over heels feeling. I am fully aware that, like the New Englander, I brought a lot of grief into the relationship -- I'm sure in some ways our matching suitcases of sadness were what drew us to each other.

But there was also this feeling, at times at least, of "I can't control this and I don't want to" which was completely new to me. I want to have that feeling again, only this time, I won't be hauling so much grief into the relationship, and I don't expect that my new partner will, either:

Been running so hard
When what I need is to unwind
The voice of reason
Is one I left so far behind
I've waited so long
So long to play this part
And just remembered
That I'd forgotten about my heart

Head over heels
Where should I go
Can't stop myself
Outta control
Head over heels
No time to think
Looks like
The whole world's out of sync...